Rolleen Myers:  Still Single…but in No Rush to Roll to the Altar

By Raiderdrive contributer 6/6/03

Editor

Former Oakland Raiderette “Rock’n” Rolleen Myers is still rocking when it comes to teaching dancing and training youth championship cheerleading teams.  All of her work is truly fulfilling and gives her a focal point other than the usual quest to marry and have children, especially now in her life when she has found something that she truly loves.

Rolleen has always believed that the key to happiness in life is being able to find a job that you love.  “It's not really work if you love it,” she claims. 

When it came to cheerleading, Rolleen loved everything about the experience, except for the jeering that goes along with the cheering:  the stereotyping that goes with the territory.  The belief persists that cheerleaders are nothing more than Barbies with ventilation ducts for brains.  “I have been trying to deal with that for so long, since I've been a cheerleader,” said Rolleen.  “So that's how it is... consistently, everybody has that stereotype.  No matter how much we do out there or how much we show our talents and our accomplishments, it always is there.”

Of course, movies and TV tend to perpetuate the less than flattering image.  “They never get it right—ever—when they portray cheerleaders,” Rolleen said with a grim laugh.  However, she readily admits that it is hard to blame TV and other forms of media because the fantasy image of the bimbo sexy blonde is out there, and that is what sells.  “We are up against money,” she asserted.

 Rolleen didn’t think she would ever become a cheerleader, but she did know for sure, from a very early age, that she would be a dancer.  “Oh, I knew before I could talk that I wanted to dance,” she declares.  “My mom tells me that I wouldn't go to sleep unless somebody played the Sesame Street theme song...I wouldn’t go to sleep unless there was music.” 

Rolleen understands quite well such limited and biased thinking when it comes to cheerleaders because she, too, was once guilty of such hasty judgments.  “I had that stereotype against cheerleaders before I became a cheerleader,” she unabashedly confessed.  “I was so sure I would never be a cheerleader.  ‘Sis boom bah,’ whatever!  It wasn't going to happen.  But, lo and behold, I was put into the situation, so I could see that it [stereotype] was not that way.”

Rolleen has experienced other changes in her perception and she is certain others have also.  She has known individuals that she could not stand at first, but then ended up the best of friends.  So in reference to cheerleaders, one might conclude that perhaps, in time, others will change their perceptions, too.

"I keep telling people how it is.  I stand up for things or tell them how it really is or put them in their place—or try to do it with kindness.  And it's fine for a moment, and then it goes right back to the same stereotype.  So I am not really sure what we can do.  I keep telling people like it is.”

Many people will still cling to the stereotype.  Some women who are, perhaps, insecure may have a need to denigrate these accomplished individuals in order to build up their own self-esteem.  And, of course, there will always be some men who need to sustain the fantasy image in order to spice up their otherwise boring lives.

Rolleen has done her best to explain to people what the world of a Raiderette is like and what talented and intelligent women inhabit that world.  She has even demonstrated that fact by her own accomplishments.  Indeed, Rolleen is a dancer, choreographer, and a guitarist.  She has performed in concert with several well-known rock musicians, including Greg Kihn, Greg Douglass, and Jeff Campitelli.  Throughout her career, she has performed in music videos, commercials, and has been a spokesmodel for local cable TV.  Her physical fitness training has paid off by providing opportunities as a swimsuit model and by helping her win the title of Miss Alameda County, USA.  Furthermore, her knowledge of TV and fitness led to her producing and hosting her own “Hard Rock Workout” TV show.  ^*  Thus, Rolleen herself stands as a perfect example of the "commitment to excellence” when it comes to Football's Fabulous Females, the Oakland Raiderettes.

However, the place that Rolleen truly demonstrates her professionalism is at the Next Step Dance Studio in Danville, CA, where she teaches youngsters dance and cheerleading.  By de-emphasizing such material aspects as winning and by concentrating on the internal value of youth activities, Rolleen has been able to instill in her students the love of cheerleading and dance, and still create championship teams.  So, even though Rolleen is not married and does not have her own children, her motherly instincts come forth in the way that she relates to her students and tries to guide them. 

Does she plan on marrying one day and having a family?  At this point in her life, Rolleen does not have a romantic interest and thus does not contemplate a nuptial event on the immediate horizon.  And she is not in any rush to roll to the altar as a result. 

A while ago, she did have one serious relationship but perhaps did not go into it with her eyes totally wide open.  The disillusionment caused her to lose faith; and she began to question whether lasting commitments can ever be fostered.  However, because she is still filled with childlike optimism that cannot be repressed, she soon restored her faith, although she no longer has any illusions about looking for Mr. Right.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     However, She firmly believes that the experience was, in the final analysis, somewhat positive: “I think I know what to look out for….  And I just figure that I'm not looking anymore.  I just want to do what I have to do.  And some day, when I'm about 60, then I'll look,” the thirty-year-old beauty says with a facetious laugh.  “I know what to look for, so it is a good thing in the end.”   

One quality that sparked her attraction to her former boyfriend was a mutual interest in and love of children.  Might she still look for that quality in someone? 

“Yes, I think that's neat.  I mean that’s important to me...they've got to care about stuff,” Rolleen explained.  “I don't really care what it is, as long as it is something good.  Whether it's about the environment or about children...making things better and having a passion.”

One thing that helps to keep Rolleen from worrying about establishing a new relationship or rushing into one too soon is the fact that she lives with her mom, Maureen, who has been a supportive force in her life.  Although Rolleen has depended on her mother during times of distress, she is by no means a “Mama's Girl.”  On the contrary, the often-recalcitrant Rolleen rarely did anything she was told to do.  It is more of a mutual need to help each other, Rolleen indicated.  Her mom is a former dance teacher, so that is one important aspect that they share.

Regarding her mom, Rolleen says, “She puts up with me,” Rolleen says with a laugh.  “I love her to death.  I don’t know what I would do without her…she’s my best friend.  She’s my audience when I need her.  You know, my life giver.”

A number of psychologists theorize that some men seek in the perfect woman or mate those qualities that were inherent in their mothers.  Well, Rolleen offers a new twist on this hypothesis.  Rolleen would be content if she could find a man whose sense of commitment and loyalty mirrors that of her mom.

Moreover, she has come to realize that it is also a matter of priorities:  “See, I'm learning now that it's really not about me trying to find somebody, it's more about somebody trying to put up with me,” she explains with a discerning laugh.  “I am really quirky.  I do strange things all the time: I tap dance in the grocery store.”

In the movie The Legend of Bagger Vance, the caddy (Will Smith) says to the golfer (Matt Damon), who is struggling with his drive, something to this effect:  “Don't try to find your swing; let it find you.”  In this Zen-inspired film, many parallels to life can be found, not just in sports but in love as well.  At the end of the film, the Damon character is reunited with his love (Charlize Theron) and he finds a new “swing” as they dance.

It seems that Rolleen has come to realize, as do all great dancers, that if they concentrate on the steps, the routines will lack spontaneity and fire.  Perhaps as she continues to find her rhythm on the dance floor, she will one day find it in her ultimate relationship as she dances through life.  And maybe just one day, she will hear a voice, and it will ask, “Can I have this dance?”  And it might even happen in a grocery store.

^*Biographical info taken from Rolleen’s website: http://raiderette.homestead.com/index~ns4.html